Complimentary Pass

Allow me to give you this warning.

If you ever come to my house, please have high self-esteem.

In fact, it might be best if you are a bit narcissitic.

Why?

Because in my house, your ego will get put in checked.

It will be more than bruised.

It will be stomped and trampled like a pile of grapes under an hippo's butt.

In my house, you have to take (and find compliments) as you find them.

"You look tall in those boots".

Thank you.

"That outfit is better than the one you had on yesterday."

Muchas gracias.

Don't get me wrong, the younguns are being raised with manners.

They won't be overtly rude to "visitors".

You get a complimentary pass on the snarky comments.

Ah, but wait for that golden moment..

Yes, that golden moment when you become "family".

Then I suggest you guard your family jewels well.

Because the snarky, sneaky ego theives are coming for 'em...

~Ms. Katrina

Not Noteworthy

Every since school started, I have been telling the children to do their homework at night.

I have said it.

I have commanded it.

I have declared it.

All the usual parental tricks that fall on, of course, death ears.

Fast forward to this lovely Monday morning.

Monday.

Which obviously comes after a weekend, yes.

A weekend in which they had plenty of time to complete homework, correct.

We are both wrong.

Because even though I told them just last night to do your homework at night, it apparently translated to wait until morning.

A fatal mistake it seems, for one unlucky son because the desktop decided that it was mad at the printer.

And said son actually had the audacity to think I was going to write him a note.

ME???

Oh, Heck NO!!

(Excuse my profanity, please and thank you.)

If he had done his homework over the weekend, the problem could have easily been rectified as the laptop and the printer are apparently on speaking terms.

If he had done his homework last night as I told him, we may have been able to stage a mediation between the desktop and the printer.

But no, he is all of fourteen and he knows everything.

The hardest part of crazy lazy mothering is knowing when to put your foot down so as not to set a precedent that will cause you more work in the future.

Ha!

Just when you thought I was being a good mommy, I turn around and make it all about ME again.

~Ms. Katrina

Flip Flop Flap

There we were, just standing at the school bus stop, when dear ol' mom (me!) happened to just look down at my lil' diva's feet. And lo and behold but what do I see...

Flip Flops!!

Now, any good parent knows that flip flops are completely against school dress code.

So, off the girl goes running to the house before I can get another word out.

Only problem is that dear ol' mom (me again!!) now spots the bus a'coming.

At my shout of "Bus!!!", the child puts it in reverse and pushes full speed ahead to the bus while the bus driver and dear ol' mom (ok, you know who this is by now, right?) laugh up a storm.

Anywho, the end of this story was going to be an inner debate on whether to take her a change of shoes, wait for a call from the school then take her some shoes, or (my pick) hope they just let her go to school and send a politely worded note home about the dress code.

But what happened was even better.

I was just rolling back into the house when a school bus pulls right up front. Not surprising, considering we live on a busy street practically at the corner of a stop light.

No, what was surprising was that lil' diva was rushing down the steps and into the house to retrieve the tardy school shoes. 

Yes, the school bus driver had driven her back to fetch them

And, yes, she rocks!!

I love our school bus driver.

She is my new hero.

Woo Hoo!!!

Woo Hoo!!

I thought Child Life didn't reconvene until next Saturday but the lil' buggers rolled on out today.

Woo Hoo!!!!!

That is all...

~Ms. Katrina

Bus It

The day was going so well. But I hadn't got out of bed yet.

On their way out the door, I gave my boys my usual salutation of "Be Blessed and a Blessing" without even opening my eyes. Ahhhh, more sleep as the girl doesn't leave for another two hours.

WRONG!

Five minutes later, I awake, dazed and confused as the boys trundle right back into the house.

You guessed it.

They missed the bus.

And, apparently only by seconds as my middle child whines "and she saw us coooooming!!"

~Sigh~

So, it seems that my oldest soon lolly-gagged on the computer, wii, whatever despite my middle son's nagging to get ready to go. (BTW, so proud of middle son's enthusiasm for school this year!!)

What's a mother to do???

Me. I call the school and let them know that they are on their way. Hand them $1 each and point them towards the appropriate HRT.

Crazy, Lazy Mothering wins again!

Of course, now I'm all nervous that they'll miss their stop.

Crap!

Guess, I'll go call the school now to make sure they made it...

School Weekend Countdown

Woo Hoo!!!

In just four...count 'em...1.2.3.4...days the children will be back in school.

On Thursday, the kids got their first official look at the new middle school. It was awesome. All of the teachers and staff was nice and encouraging, which is always good. And a few of them recognized my kids from their prior school and from the Child Life Center. I'm actually excited about that because I wanted them to know at least somebody and their weren't too many kids in the 8th grade attending the meet-n-greet.

The classes sound good too. Not my children's first choices because we didn't get the Wait List call until mid-August and all of the best were, of course, taken by then. But, it is pretty close to what they would have been studying at the prior school anyway, so, eh, no biggee. On the plus side, 5 out of 7 classes are credit bearing for high school. Yes!!

Friday, we visited with the 5th graders school. Some warm, comfortable feeling as prior years so I'm happy. Of course, Baby Girl went all shy on the teachers as if she hadn't been there for 6 years now. Lol. Kids can be so funny sometimes.

For example, yesterday, the 13-year-old, Mr. Too-Cool-for-School himself, was prancing around the house in his new school uniform, tie and all. Methinks he caught the enthusiasm fever on Thursday. Let's hope his enthusiasm remains constant for the entire school year.

More shopping to do today and tomorrow. Send the boy's out to get their hair cut. Purchase clothes for the Lil' Diva.

And then on Tuesday, wave (tearfully, uh huh) good-bye as the bus carries them off to their new set of adventures.

~Ms. Katrina

Busy, Busy Day.

Today was a busy, busy day. The morning started out with me going to do my Thursday morning volunteerism. But, instead of showing up at 10 am as I usually do, I was "invited" to show up at 9 am instead (God was cracking the whip!) to help pack bags. Apparently I am a "good worker". Er, I always think of myself as the worst type of slacker but I most put on a good show. Lol. Or other people slack way better than I do. I'll work on that, I promise.

Anyway, bags packed, signed people up, tidied up the clothes closet. Morning well-spent giving back and putting a few checks in the Welcome to Heaven boxes.

Stopping by my friend's house on the way home, I was surprised with an invite to Quiznos. (See what all those Good Girl checks will getcha.) As usual, I had chicken. Odd thing about me, I always order chicken. I may think I want beef but I always order chicken. My friends have learned to live with my quirks.

My friend had the AT&T GoPhone but when we went to Rite-Aid, they didn't have the $15 refill card. So, instead, we trundled off to Radio Shack, and she got Boost Mobile Unlimited. It so rocks not having to worry about sending her a text message or calling her and sucking up all her minutes. Yay!!

Meanwhile, by the time we trundle on home, we have been gone all day. And being that it was after 4, there was no use in me going to sleep as I certainly wake up for my second shift volunteerism. Oo-ra. I guess. ~Yawn~

Wow, was it a busy day for people giving away free food. This mornings line should have been a clue but I passed that off on us being late to unlock the door because we were busy chit-chat...er...working. That was just a delusion because the line for the hot meal was blessedly long. Usually, we are done by 7:15 but tonight we had a line going all the way to 7:45. Geesh. And I got hit on three times; once by a boy that I know I'll have to check id.

Finally wrapped up my day of non-parenting by stopping by my other friend's house because since I work from home, she always comes to see me instead. Her schedule is more in flux than mine. MINE: Scratch, scratch, turn. Scratch the other side. Lol. JK. I work hard. It just never seems like it is very hard because A. It is from home and B. I enjoy what I do.

Anyways, while over her house, another of her friends stopped by with her puppy-wuppy-cutie-pie. And yeah, I have sucker written all over my forehead because I may soon be getting a chihuahua pup when she mates her baby.

Back at home, finally, and barely get a "hey, mom" before they put their heads down and head off to dreamland.

Yes, today was a Mother of the Year day.

Where's my Mug?

~Ms. Katrina

Yesterday was a blast.

So, yesterday was a blast.

There I was getting a good nights rest. Dreaming about needing to go to the hospital. Only, I end up going to the Children's Hospital. (The babies crying was my clue that I was in the wrong place.) So, I leave the hospital to go to DePaul (why DePaul when Norfolk General is right next door, I'll never understand) only the sound of a child crying follows me as I walk down the road.

Kick in the Mommy instincts.

Because upon waking, lo and behold, my middle child was crying away. Now, for those of you picturing a baby or toddler, let me inform you that said middle child is too-cool-for-school 13-year-old boy. So...crying?? Yeah, full mama mood is in effect.

After prying (yep, even in pain, he is still a typical teen) the reason for his crying out him, I rush him to CHKD. He is having pain behind his eyes but no other symptoms. This information even stumps the medical professionals who give him everything including the neurological exam.

Three hours later, you wanna know what the problem is?? (I know, bad grammar.)

The boy had stayed up to 3 am playing the Wii.

Eye fatigue anyone.

Geesh.

4 hours out of my day well-spent.

Hmph.

Got my revenge though.

The Doctor prescribed 24 hours with no television and no video games.

So, he's sitting in the room, all bored and lonely, pouting and whining as only a teen can!

Bruhahaha.

Is it wrong to take pleasure in his misery???

Nah....

Lol.

And, of course, I reinstated the rule of 10 pm and all electronics go off that I had relaxed for the summer vacation.

Need I say that his older brother is not well-pleased.

Or his little sister, for that matter.

Or the boy that I babysit.

Aww, my poor baby spent the day getting all kinds of evil looks.

Hehehe.

Bad Mommy. BAD!

But, hey, at least I got to watch The Wizard of Oz while at the hospital.

The extended version.

Did I mention it was 4 hours...

Late for School (Supplies)

Here it is, literally just days away from school starting and what have I bought.

Nada.

Why do I feel another year of last minute rush-to-buy school supplies coming on?

And half the time, they don't even use the stuff on the list.

Hm, maybe I should just get the staples and hit the other stuff as they need it.

Pondering....

I can't be the only one...

In today's society, we are still bombarded with the image of the perfect mom.

Y'know, that lady that brings home the bacon, fries it up in a pan, and never ever let you forget you're a....oh, wait, that's the perfect wifey. Lol.

The perfect mom tends to be in one of two camps, depending on who you ask.

Mom Type 1 (in no particular order, by the way) is the so-called traditional stay-home mother of the immaculate house, perfect kids, and adoring husband. (Um, how many of them have you seen, really?)

Or, there is perfect Mom Type 2 who can go to work, raise the children, and not emasculate her husband, boyfriend, or baby daddy (if she's manage to hang on to him, that is).

But I'm here today to keep it real.

My house is a mess most times whether I'm working that day or not.

The kids are wonderful (for me) but no where near perfect (and smart talking to boot!)

And the husband, well, he was dismissed long ago.

I am a crazy, lazy mom...and I love it!